Fulfilling Your Dreams

by Pettis Perry


Dreams

Dreams have always been very important to me as a release for my vivid imagination. As a child they gave me the ability to fantasize about traveling to other planets and other galaxies, fighting as a warrior championing great causes to bring peace to my people, and finding the one true love that I was destined to marry. They also gave me the opportunity to escape the racism and all of its manifestations for children like me growing up during the 1950s and '60s including the associated political struggles, civil unrest, and large scale violence of the times. 

While I wanted nothing more than to simply be a child, to laugh, play, and be accepted by my community, my Life path would carry me in another direction. Now, reflecting back upon my circumstances as a child I understand why my path emerged as it did. Had my life evolved differently then I too would be a different person than I am today, and possibly this blog might have never been written. 

My dreams have also given me hope in times of deep despair. In my darkest moments my dreams brought light to illuminate my circumstance. When there was no one else, my dreams kept me company (and still do). While my life has not turned out quite like I had dreamed about and imagined as a child looking forward at the kind of life I wanted for myself, my Life has been incredibly wonderful nonetheless. 

Nightmares Are Still Dreams 

As I contemplate the most impactful of my challenges there are a couple of lessons that produced exponential growth. The unexpected death of my father radically changed my world. I was 15 when he passed away. At 15 1/2 I found myself having to pack our entire household as we headed to northern California. My older brother was already in northern California and my younger brother was out of the country. My mother became ill and I was alone to pack up all of our belongings to move somewhere I did not want to go. I was alone, heartbroken, and left to become a man at 15 1/2 years of age. Reflecting back on that time some 45 years later still evokes many of the feelings I had as a child leaving the place I still call home.

So much of me was ripped from my being. So much of me was invested in living in Altadena--my home. So much of me still remains in Altadena. Yet, even though my attachment to Altadena remains to this day, starting anew in northern California was probably the best thing that could have happened to me. I was headed down a dangerous path leading to prison or a pine box. My anger towards the racism I experienced, and more importantly the loss of my father, fueled  a raging fire in my soul. I cared about nothing, I hated everyone, and I was losing my Self. I even came to blame my mother for everything that was wrong in my life because of my inner turmoil. 

It wasn't until 8 or 9 years later while taking a Transactional Analysis class at San Francisco State that something clicked in my head; and it resonated so deeply in my heart that it became the threshold for entering a new way of living. The moment was so significant that it allowed me to see my world differently and to begin a life of intentionality--a life of living fully and completely as a human being.

Manifesting Dreams

As a result of my childhood experiences and the experiences I've since had, I understand with crystal clarity why my parents did what they did and why the path I have journeyed was so important to take. You see, it was in one of my darkest moments that my path was revealed to me by the Universe. In my darkest moment, I confirmed to my Self that in spite of the horrific trials I found my Self in, that I was precisely where I needed to be in order to take the next small step in my own growth making it possible for me take a great leap for mankind! Little did I know at the time that my Life course was leading me to a lifetime of service to humanity. But, there was so much inner work yet to be completed before I could fully manifest my own potential and fulfill my dreams. One important lesson I have since learned is that my inner work is a lifelong project and therefore shall never be completed--making Life a process of always Becoming.

It was in this darkest moment, which appeared to me as a nightmare, that my true path was revealed to show me that my childhood dreams were actually coming true. I finally understood that as a boy I was angry and the world appeared to be doing everything it could to keep me from attaining my goals let alone my emerging sense of purpose. I came to understand that during my period of transitioning from boy to man I learned to channel my anger into fuel for positive change. I understood that for many years I struggled with having to accept the fact that I could not change life circumstances and that I would have to play the hand of cards I was dealt by my Life circumstances. This became a very liberating time for me because I understood that my life path was causing me to  fully own my life from that moment forward and to have the greatest compassion for the plight of others. It was clear to me that but for the grace of God go I. I understood with crystal clarity that my life could always be worse. All I had to do was look around me and I could see what my life could become.

To illustrate this point, one day I was coming home from work and I was feeling sorry for myself. As I made the turn to enter the freeway ramp I noticed a motorist who was stuck on the ramp trying to fix something with his car. After entering the freeway and driving for a few miles I saw another motorist being ticketed by the police for some infraction. And, about 10 minutes later farther up the freeway a third motorist was on the side of the road under his hood. The only thing I could do was to start laughing aloud at myself and saying out loud, Okay I get it! Stop feeling sorry for yourself because life could always be worse!

As an executive leader, consultant, and now teacher my ability to dream, fantasize, and visualize produces crystal clear images that my analytical mind can then render into prototypical systems that transcend standard performance. In other words, my ability to function as a highly successful professional has been facilitated by my ability to dream, visualize, and then convert the visions into something tangible. 

In order to do this successfully over long periods of time in business (or any other type of organization or group) or any Life process requires not only planning the strategic intent but having the capacity to allow the inner child we all have within us to come out and play because it is through play that we are free to think and perform freely as we did as children without concern for what others think.

Keeping Dreams Alive

Dreams are powerful gifts that allow us to choose a direction and course of action for our lives. They give us a sense of hope and possibility. They allow us to fantasize and transcend the human form by giving us the capacity to explore domains that are well outside of the physical body.

Dreaming and then choosing a direction is far better than allowing the winds of change to guide your life. By choosing a direction you are in control. Allowing the winds of change to determine your direction places you at the mercy of the winds.

As with any journey, it is important to remember that sometimes the winds of change will become so strong that they cause us to move off course and to find another route to our destination. The change causes us to see and experience new aspects of life that were unplanned and at the same time, while causing ambiguity, enrich our lives by producing new challenges to overcome. By overcoming these challenges we gain strength and confidence to engage the world more fully.

The best advice I can offer is to say NEVER give up on your dreams because sometimes they are all you have. Stay true to your dreams and you will be amazed at what happens as a result of dreaming throughout the lifetime. Remember too, allowing others to dictate your dreams will cause you to find that you are living someone else's nightmare. 

As my mom used to remind me, keep your head in the clouds with your feet firmly planted on the ground--sage advice I've come to know as truth; and embrace your dreams rather than dismissing them as some childhood folly. Consequently, someday you might find yourself awaking from a nightmare, as I did, realizing that your dreams have indeed been manifesting through the entire journey. More importantly, it is through your dreams that you produce a wonderful and meaningful Life. With that singular purpose in mind I say,  Dream on!